BuzzFlash Reviews

BUZZFLASH REVIEWS

From Publishers Weekly:

"In his latest offering, the author of The Hipster Handbook brings his brand of sardonic wit and caricature assassination to bear on all things evangelical. Like all great satire, the book is cerebral, irreverent and hilarious, while also edifying in introducing the characters, vocabulary and complex political and social network loosely referred to as the Christian right. Lanham skillfully navigates the "Evangophobe" through the treacherous waters of Colorado Springs ("the Evangelical Vatican"); goes after leaders like Jerry Falwell, whose health, Lanham writes, "has been declining ever since he got shrapnel in his leg from the war on Christmas"; and explains the megachurch phenomenon, where congregations approaching 20,000 people can contribute $6 million annually. Readers familiar with Lanham's style will immediately recognize his self-deprecating irony and indomitably hip sensibility. Despite the sometimes predictable snarkiness and easy targets, Lanham keeps the humor sharp throughout."

We've always wondered how people believe they become Teflon-coated from criticism if they simply avow that they believe in Christ. We've never been able to have Christ personally affirm the faith of anyone. He's been long gone from the scene.

So, if I say I am holy and righteous, does that make me holy and righteous?

Or would you judge me holy and righteous by my deeds.

The modern Christian/Bushevik radicals believe that it is enough for them to claim that they are divinely inspired to prove that God sanctions everything they do, even if what they do is lie, kill and steal from the poor.

"The Sinner's Guide to the Evangelical Right" is a satire, but -- like the Daily Show or The Colbert Report -- it's humor reveals the basic truth. Which is to say that the "sinners" of the world may be closer to Jesus and the divine than those who use God's name for personal enrichment, power building, and political gain.

Judge people by their deeds, not their self-serving self-righteousness and the goodness of God shall surely be revealed -- and the impostors exposed.

Here's an Excerpt from the book:

"How to Argue with Ultraconservative Fundamentalists


On Defending the Environment (what they call "Creation Care"):

Fundamentalists say: God says in Genesis "let mankind have dominion over all the earth." Plus, the Rapture is coming soon, so why bother picking up our beef jerky wrappers if the end is near?

Sinners say: God also promoted stewardship of the Earth in Genesis. And dominion isn't a synonym for pillage. Otherwise Genesis would state, "kick the living shit out of that tick-infested dump, it sucks worse than Hell." Environmental disasters, like Katrina or polluted waterways, hit the poor the hardest. In fact, the progressive Christian charity, Christian Aid, released a report in 2006 warning that close to 200 million people could die in Africa by the year 3000 as a result of famine, drought, and floods brought on by climate change. And remember, Revelation 11:18 says God will destroy those who destroy the earth.


On Gay Marriage:

Fundamentalists say: What's next? Are you gonna let them have sex with cocker spaniels? God calls it an abomination.

Sinners say: Why do evangelicals always use cocker spaniels as an example? Cocker spaniels are straight. Greyhounds, on the other hand. Now they're into that gay shit. Despite evangelicals' rhetoric about the institution of marriage being placed under attack by the liberals and the gays, the real assault is coming from within their own ranks. According to Barna Research, Born Again Christians have a higher divorce rate than any other social group in the United States.


Intelligent Design

Fundamentalists say: Humans are too complex to not have a Creator.

Sinners say: Who created God? He's complex too, right? Does God have an Intelligent Designer as well? Plus, there are many unintelligent imperfections in nature, such as the human eye, whose inside-out retina causes a blind spot in our field of vision. And come on, would an Intelligent Designer really create Matchbox 20, Vin Diesel, or men with nipples? If you want to teach Intelligent Design, save it for philosophy class. It's not science.


Euthanasia:

Fundamentalists say: The Youth-in-Asia worship oriental dragon gods and don't realize that the fortunes inside those cookies are tools of Satan.

Sinners say: God never intended for us to be kept alive on machines, otherwise he'd have included a power switch on our asses.


Michael Moore:

Fundamentalists say: He's annoying.

Sinners say: He's annoying.


Women

Fundamentalists say: Women need to accept their traditional gender role as casserole-cooking servants. They allowed sin to enter the Garden of Eden and are weaker than men emotionally and physically.

Sinners say: The Old Testament often compares God to a mother. Jesus loved women too. He appeared to Mary Magdalene first after resurrecting instead of revealing himself to some smelly disciple with a fig-leaf jockstrap.


Capital Punishment

Fundamentalists say: The Bible says an eye for an eye.

Sinners say: The Bible also says thou shall not kill. Jesus spent his time on earth forgiving and healing sinners, not strapping them to a chair and shooting lightning bolts.


The Iraq War

Fundamentalists say: We support the troops but often wonder why there was no cool T-shirt line, like in Operation Desert Storm.

Sinners say: We support the troops but wonder why there was no planning or exit strategy.


The Holidays

Fundamentalists say: A banner at Target says Happy Holidays! Quick, tell the kids to crouch beneath their desks! There's a war on Christmas!

Sinners say: It's true. We've waged war on the holiday because there is strong evidence to support that Christmas has tried to obtain highly refined aluminum tubes from Africa to reinstate its WMD program. Come on...Nobody, except Falwell and O'Reilly, cares if you want to call it Christmas or even Baby Jesus Birthday Cake Day. As long as you're okay with Jews wishing you Happy Hanukkah and sending you a Cracker Barrel gift basket where the pork sausage stick has been replaced with Kosher liverwurst, a decorative menorah, and a yarmulke. And incidentally, Bush has sent out a generic "happy holidays" card every year since he's taken office."




BUZZFLASH REVIEWS