Late Night Network Wimps

by Tony Peyser

For well over a week now
The “internets”have gone gaga
Over the mind-boggling
And strange Jeff Gannon saga.

Right into The White House
This fake journalist was placed
To gay escort web sites
His name was later traced.

This kind of juicy scandal
Has so much amazing dirt
It could make every atheist
Comedy writer convert.

I eagerly waited to hear
The one-liners fly each day
From the likes of Conan,
Craig and Dave and Jay.

I knew that they would give this
All its proper attention
But the Gannon story
From them got barely a mention.

If Mr. Johnny Carson
Had been reading all the blogs
He’d have put a joke or three
About Jeff in his monologues.

(“Ed, you should take this advice:
Don’t ever tell your mom
About your latest web site
Weirdmilitarystud.com.”)

Leno still does Monica jokes
It’s his endless source of fun
Does he know the Democrats lost
And all the Republicans won?

Bill Maher’s show returned last week
And his praises I’m now singing:
He brought up Gannon right away
And happily started swinging.

Jon Stewart earlier did this, too,
He’s also willing and able
To prove TV’s best satire
Has all moved over to cable.

The late night network titans
Should take on this new mess
Gannon’s the new Lewinsky
(And may have his own blue dress.)

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Tony Peyser provides poems and weekly cartoons for The Santa Monica Mirror and writes the new BuzzFlash column, "Blue State Jukebox." He was also a daily cartoonist for the L.A. Times from 1994 to 1997. You can contact Tony via email at tonypeyser@yahoo.com.

BuzzFlash Cartoons by Tony Peyser are © Tony Peyser.
Contact Tony for reprint permissions.

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