BuzzFlash Reader Satire
September 16, 2002
Protecting Your Mental Health
by Dr. J. D. Stewart, Ed.D.
According to Mr. G.W. Bush, "In these perilous times we can't be too careful." Based on that assumption, it is obvious that we all must take the best possible care of our Bush-induced fragile mental health. Following is a brief 10-item Mental Health Survey that will help give you a better perspective on the current status of your mental health.
[CAUTION: Be aware that the results of this survey, while not (yet) medically substantiated, may indicate the need for prescriptive medication or even institutional care. If so, see your nearest mental health care professional IMMEDIATELY!]
MENTAL HEALTH SURVEY
QUESTION: Which of the following causes you the most stress, anxiety, nervousness, weight loss, sleepless nights, pet-kicking, red-light-running, and /or Outright Clinical Depression ?
___ 1. G.W. Bush telling the rest of us to do as he says but not as he did.
___ 2. Despite court injunctions, D. Cheney not telling anybody anything about anything. (Unless they want to hear a reprise of "Attack Iraq.")
___
3. a. D. Rumsfeld telling us that our attacking Iraq is inevitable.
___ b. The rest of the civilized world - except Tony "Echo"
Blair - telling us our attacking Iraq would be one of the stupidest things
they ever heard of.
___
4. a. G.W. Bush telling us that Jose Padilla is an "enemy combatant"
and therefore not entitled to legal representation.
___ b. Police reports telling us that Mr. Padilla is an American citizen,
arrested on the streets of Chicago.
___
5. a. C. Powell confirming that official (Bush) American foreign policy
is now to reserve the unilateral right to launch pre-emptive strikes against
any nation, any time, anywhere that is "perceived to be a threat
to the United States."
___ b. That such a foreign policy gives any nation /group the moral cover
to launch a "preemptive strike" against the U.S. - any time,
anywhere.
___ 6. G.W. Bush telling the United Nations they must quickly act collectively against Iraq or, being out of patience, he will act unilaterally
___
7. a. J. Ashcroft telling us his "Department of Justice" has
detained 1500 people without benefit of legal representation or even public
release of their names, despite a Federal judge's order.
___ b. Being historically aware of the civil liberties situation in Germany
in the late 1930s.
___
8. a. G.W. Bush telling us that the EPA report on global warming sent
to the United Nations was merely "written by the bureaucrats."
___ b. Almost every reputable, non-oil industry scientist on earth telling
us that global warming is writing its own report, verified by Mother Nature.
___
9. a. The noise of the Republicans
___ b. The silence of the Democrats
___ 10. ALL OF THE ABOVE
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Design: Dr. J. D. Stewart, Ed.D., VWL (Very Worried Liberal)
[NOTE: This survey is intentionally not copywritten and can therefore be shared freely for non-commercial use via any appropriate /available medium. Dr. J.D.S., Ed.D.]
v. 1.1 9.11.02
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