A BuzzFlash Reader Commentary
Another State of the Union
January 30, 2002
My fellow Republicans -
It has been a hard year. Evil doers have attacked us. My daughters drink. I choked on a pretzel. Someone named Ken Lay keeps calling me. Mr. Lay, whoever you are, please stop. I don't know you.
But I'm here tonight to tell you that I'm proud to be a Murican. In the audience there is a great Murican named Lee Greenwood. His song makes us all proud. Stand up Lee.
(Foot stomping, cheering)
song is called "God Bless the USA." I know God loves this country.
Jesus loves this
would personally drop a daisycutter on the evil ones because they are
bad. They are evildoers.
rises. Chants "Thank you John" 50 times.)
I'm that VERY (pause) HUNGRY (pause) CATERPILLAR!
thunderous applause, shouting, whistling for 10 minutes.)
* * *
And now, reaction from the press and pundits:
Chris "Tweety" Matthews: A great speech, a defining moment. "Ich bin ein caterpiller" I loved it!
Howard Fineman: I'm leaving to join the team headed for Mt. Rushmore in the morning!
Russert: (Only shoot me above the waist please) Gettysburg what? History
Sean Hannity: I put a call into the Pope. He's going to be the first living guy canonized.
Peggy Noonan: He makes Reagan look like a lightweight. Laura, would you like to share?
TOMORROW'S HEADLINE : A BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLY - Bush Soars!!
* * *
With regret that this is what it's come to,
Contributed by BuzzFlash Reader HP Mecartea
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