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November
26,
2003
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Mrs. Bush Goes to Britain A BUZZFLASH READER COMMENTARY Either Laura Bush is the most
naive human on the planet or she is the biggest propaganda artist.
According to an article I read the other day, "She told reporters
that Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip had been gracious hosts and had
made a middle-aged couple from Texas feel at home with their royal
hospitality." It is unfortunate that Her
Majesty's guests weren't gracious. According to an exclusive by Terry
O'Hanlon on Sunday, the Bushes did thousands of pounds of damage to the
Buckingham Palace Gardens. I think the pounds refer to British currency
and not the weight of the damage, although there was a lot of it, and they
still haven't assessed all of it. "I had a really good time
being with both Her Majesty and His Royal Highness Prince Philip and the
Prince of Wales, as well," Mrs. Bush said. That would have been after they
landed Marine One and other helicopters on large H's the Bush people put
in the lawn. The H, no doubt, stands for HOGS because that is who created
the damage. And Mrs. Bush appears not to have noticed. "In many ways they tried to make us feel very comfortable and you can imagine that we're slightly intimidated," she said. But they even asked to replace the window panes at the palace, which made it through the Battle of Britain, but not the battle of the Bushes. According to O'Hanlon's article, "The rotors of the President's Marine Force One helicopter and two support Black Hawks damaged trees and shrubs that had survived since Queen Victoria's reign." Obviously they weren't intimidated enough. "You can guess that someone from Texas might be a little amazed that they would find themselves staying at Buckingham Palace," she said. There she goes again, sounding like some little wide-eyed twit from the Texas sticks on her first trip to Six Flags. "And Bush's army of clod-hopping security service men trampled more precious and exotic plants," according to O'Hanlon. They will be the last U.S. President and First Lady to be invited. I hope no one gets the idea that all Texans would do this crap. "Mrs. Bush went on to say that she and the president had been pleasantly surprised to find they shared interests with the queen and the prince which had helped ease their nervousness." Rebellious off-spring will always bring friends together, no matter how different the background. "We like a lot of the same things," she said. "We have dogs that we love. We have two little horses on our ranch. So there are lots of things, a lot of similarities that we have." The Queen's flock of flamingos may never be the same after they had to be removed because they might fly into the choppers propellers. They were traumatized by the move and may never return home. The head gardener is said to be in tears, the damage will cost thousands of pounds that the British taxpayer will have to pay. Well, I have a better idea: send that bill to the RNC. Bush has collected millions and I'm sure his supporters would be happy to ante up. They have had 30,000 visitors, and it took the Bushes one visit to destroy the gardens on the first official visit since 1929. The Queen's garden furniture and things she personally owns are covered by insurance. "The first lady also professed ignorance of the controversy surrounding a British tabloid newspaper's explosive revelation on Wednesday that one of its reporters had been able to get a job as a royal footman at the palace and worked there for two months prior to the state visit." Professed ignorance? Laura takes naiveté to such a height it's a wonder she doesn't have a perpetual nose-bleed. "'I actually just read it in the newspaper,' she said, adding that she didn't know if her husband had been told of the security breach which has led to an urgent review of palace hiring practices." A security breach, a possible terrorist, no, an embedded journalist. They wanted their own yes man, Tim Russert. "If the president was informed, he failed to inform me," she said. He always denies anyone told him anything, except that thing about the British knowing about WMDs which caused him to invade. She is his silent, submissive lump. "Asked whether she had been put off by large-scale protests against the visit and anti-American sentiment in Britain, Mrs. Bush said she had seen many more pro-U.S. demonstrators." I have said many times, "The Bushes say there are no protesters because they haven't seen any and it is the truth. You aren't allowed close enough." That is why they took advantage of the Queen's hospitality and destroyed her gardens, so they wouldn't have to go through protesters. "'I don't actually think the protests are near as large as everyone was predicting before we got here,'" she said, as a crowd estimated by police to be between 100,000 and 110,000 strong marched in protest." If the Bushes don't see them, then they weren't there. It's the invisible protesters again. They could have been predicting the entire population of Great Britain to protest. "We've seen plenty of American flags. We've seen plenty of people who were waving to us, many, many more people, in fact than we've seen protesters." They didn't see the Bush statue fall probably think it was filmed elsewhere. They make sure they never see protesters so they can truthfully say, everyone we saw, loved us. She's to much of a lady to do such a thing, but the Queen should insist on landing one of those British Harrier Jets that land like helicopters in the rose garden. I would like to apologize to Her Majesty and assure her that the Bushes are not representative of U.S. citizens or of Texans. Let's do the Queen a favor and not re-elect this ill-behaved clod and his lump. P.S.: And while I am at it, he was greeting soldiers in an army jacket again. He is still AWOL. He owes us nearly two years. Send him to Iraq.
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