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Orrin
Hatch: The Maestro
A
SPECIAL BUZZFLASH GUEST COMMENTARY
by
David Podvin
While conservatives who are mortals must content themselves with merely
lying every time they open their mouths, Utah Republican Senator Orrin
Hatch has evolved into a superhuman fabricator extraordinaire. Hatch
has an implacable vendetta against reality; he treats facts the way
Itchy treats Scratchy. In his unctuous way, the senator has established
himself as the most shamelessly hypocritical operative in a political
movement based on shameless hypocrisy and festering with hypocritical
operatives. Hatch is prevaricating poetry in motion; witnessing him lie is like
watching Da Vinci sketch in charcoal or listening to Hendrix play a
Stratocaster. Orrin Hatch is a savant in the art of deception – so
prolific, yet so effortless. His magisterial recitals are exhilarating
- you feel like standing and cheering: "Bravo, Maestro! Please favor
us with a thrilling encore of your deadpan rhapsody about how the Endangered
Species Act is the primary cause of unemployment in America!"
As a result of his all-encompassing mendacity, the morally superior
people of the red state of Utah revere Hatch, repeatedly returning
him to the Senate with overwhelming majorities. One analyst put it
this way: "Unless Orrin has the misfortune to run against a convicted
perjurer, he will be re-elected forever."
Hatch’s
latest molestation of the truth involves the nomination of right
wing Stepford Wife Miguel Estrada to a federal judgeship. To
hear Hatch tell it, anti-Hispanic bigotry is the only possible reason
for opposing the latest Antonin Scalia clone. This premise makes bigots
of Democratic senators, the public in general, and even Hispanic Americans,
who apparently loathe themselves unless they conform to the desires
of Señor Hatch.
That
would be the same Señor Hatch who spent eight years opposing
the Hispanic judicial nominees of President Clinton; in fact, Hatch
sought to prevent them from even receiving the courtesy of the Judiciary
Committee Hearing that Estrada has already been given (twice). Through
the years, Hatch has consistently fought the Hispanic community on
everything from civil liberties to education funding to economic opportunity.
Now, he finds it politically expedient to pose as the champion of Hispanics
in order to gain the confirmation of yet another reactionary judge.
A brief detour into reality: The Congressional Hispanic Caucus opposes
Estrada, as does the Labor Council for Latin American Advancement,
the Puerto Rican Legal Defense and Education Fund, and the Mexican
American Legal Defense and Educational Fund. He is supported by anti-immigration
groups like American Patrol and Voice of Citizens Together that rail
against the influx of "brown sludge" into this country.
Even though Estrada has repeatedly been voted down, Hatch continues
to push ever harder, striving to win through an endless repetition
of lies designed to erode the will of the opposition. The most unfortunate
feature of American politics is that the less validity a cause possesses,
the greater devotion it inspires in its advocates. No one in this country
is more committed to his objectives than is Orrin Hatch, and no objectives
are less worthy of such commitment.
The quintessential Hatch moment occurred in 2000 during the Florida
recount. The senator was being interviewed about vote-counting procedures
when he misinterpreted a question. He launched into a stirring defense
of what he thought was the Bush position and condemned anyone who disagreed
with him as being un-American. When it was pointed out that he had
actually just defended the Gore point of view, Hatch – without flinching
or showing the slightest outward sign of embarrassment – then launched
into a stirring defense of the opposite position and condemned anyone
who disagreed with him as being un-American.
Even in the amoral world of "public service", Hatch has carved out
a special niche as a liar’s liar and demagogue nonpareil. To paraphrase
Will Rogers, Orrin Hatch never met a smear he didn’t like. He was the
point man during the Republican gang rape of Professor Anita Hill’s
reputation. On that occasion, Hatch repeatedly accused Hill of being
mentally deranged as he successfully diverted attention away from the
numerous acts of perjury that had been committed by Clarence Thomas.
The senator has also publicly questioned the sanity of Lani Guinier
and Dr. Joycelyn Elders, a roster of targets that - to the perceptive
observer - might constitute a theme.
Hatch was a leader in the drive to manufacture a reason to impeach
Bill Clinton, implying that the Republicans had gruesome evidence of
incriminating behavior by the president that was just too grotesque
to reveal – or even discuss - in public. The devastating proof against
Clinton remains hidden to this day, a remarkable tribute to the extreme
discretion and sense of fair play that one always associates with the
far right.
It has been quite a career for Orrin Hatch, and in his role as Chairman
of the Senate Judiciary Committee, the best is undoubtedly yet to come.
The man who made it his personal crusade to maintain as many vacancies
in the courts as possible by ruthlessly stiff-arming highly qualified
Clinton nominees will now burnish his own legacy by ramming through
one right wing fanatic after another. He will invoke double standards
and cite nonexistent precedents in order to hijack the federal court
system by any means necessary.
Ultimately, there looms the grand prize: a reliable fifth Supreme
Court vote to overturn Roe v. Wade. Hatch has stated that he is absolutely
determined to make this happen, and in order to overcome the great
public resistance to the destruction of reproductive rights, he will
have to play to his own strengths: hypocrisy, duplicity, and an unlimited
supply of good old-fashioned self-righteous bullshit.
Hatch
learned the value of deceit by watching his boyhood hero, Richard
Nixon, himself a master of deception and slander. If the senator’s
role model were able to observe the current political landscape,
he would be gratified to see that Orrin Hatch is faithfully carrying
on
the venerable Republican tradition of defaming opponents and diminishing
public discourse with a never-ending torrent of malicious partisan
lies.
"Checkers," the old degenerate would say approvingly as he stroked
his flea-ridden little mascot, "I never did it better myself."
A SPECIAL BUZZFLASH GUEST COMMENTARY
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